I would like to say that I have a good excuse for not writing for the last....I don't even know how many weeks....We will pretend that I was devastated because of Blake and Miranda's sudden split recently after my last post....But that's really not the reason. I pretty much am just terrible at creating a habit. 

Life is funny sometimes....(Isn't that in about a million different country songs?) It's funny because as well as we think we know ourselves, there seems to always be someone who knows us just as well, if not better. I'm learning that in my own life. I seem to be so sure of something, and then someone in my family, (Usually my fiance or my grandma) tells me that I'm wrong and then proceeds to tell me why and even though I hear what they're telling me, I always seem to go against council and learn the hard way. Luckily for me, I'm surrounded by people who love me, regardless of my stupid decisions.

That brings me to the topic of this post......Still not doing this weekly like I should be. I'm sorry!!(Assuming anyone is even reading this.) I was listening to a playlist on apple music recently, the title for the playlist escapes me, but most of the songs were about, for simple explanation, gratitude. Gratitude is a simple thing. I've figured out that most often in my own life, I don't seem to show enough gratitude. I have learned that I tend to just ASSUME certain things. This is a TERRIBLE habit. It follows me everywhere. I have set a personal goal for myself to make sure that whether it be to my fiance, my friends, my son, or my boss, I am consistently showing gratitude. I feel that too often in the world gratitude is all too often forgotten. I haven't set up much of an "action plan" so to speak, but I have started to just start with the "little:" things. I want to be able to end every meal and tell my fiance "thank you" when I know she worked hard to make such a wonderful meal for our family. I want to be able to tell my son "thank you" for giving me an opportunity to share life lessons with him and share memories with him. I want to be able to tell my boss "thank you" for allowing me to work and earn a paycheck which allows me to put food on my table to feed my family with and keep a roof over our heads.

Back to my fiance.....I know I talk about her a lot. I kinda love her a lot ;) She is INCREDIBLE. I honestly have no idea where I would be or what I would do without her. She is an angel. She always puts my needs before her own. She is an incredible mother to our son and she is always working so hard in and out of the house. That sounds to me like a lot to be grateful for.

Now what does this have to do with country music? HA! That's exactly the point....This post is about my gratitude for country music. At 4 years old, I was singing Elvis music. Soon after, I was singing Tim McGraw and George Strait and those are the very two men who I got to see at my very first concert. Country music has always been a major part of my life. My family...or most of it anyways, loves country music. It just feels good. You can listen to songs like "Sweet Southern Comfort" or "Amarillo By Morning" and you just can't help but be in a good mood. Country music can rattle your soul. Listen to "He Stopped Loving Her Today" or "The Ride" and tell me it doesn't evoke some emotion. There is a song for every mood and every occasion. And for me, it was a love for singing country music that has always had a tight grip on me. It's that love of singing country music that led me to choir and choir is what led me to the love of my life. I really could tie country music to any aspect of my life.

I'd bet anyone reading this can instantly relate a country song to a memory. I can do it with MANY songs. Be grateful for the music we are blessed with. Be grateful for those who share their gifts with us. For those of you who share the love of making music with me, be grateful we have that gift. Share that gratitude with the other people in your life. 

Love, Drugs, and Country Music

Love, Drugs, and Country Music

Annnnddddd I'm back already!!! I've been trying to writer this post for a while now. I found this picture scrolling through Facebook recently....and I mean, where else am I going to find anything these days? It has become such a "trend" if you will, to be "country". It has become a trend to put on boots, jeans, and a tank top or a plaid shirt. There's so much more to being "country" though. I am not the best person to be lecturing on that particular matter, but what I do want to bring to light is this picture. I want to bring to light the fact that over the course of 60-70 since country music has been brought to the world, it's always at least be true to singing about true love. It's been an outlet for the creative soul to really speak his or her feelings about that special someone. And it has also proven that it's not just a story. It's been backed through every generation with a "power couple" to show that true love can exist and that even when there are hard times, love always finds a way. 

Lets take example number 1: Johnny Cash and June Carter

Let me start by saying I don't really have a favorite couple, and so this list is going to go in chronological order. Johnny and June are also a very good way for me to start this list because they have such a powerful story. If anyone has seen "Walk The Line" then you know how the story goes for the most part. The things I want to focus on though, are the things that make this story great though. Mainly: Johnny Cash and his many addictions and June's ability to see through those and still love the man behind them. There is a scene in "Walk The Line" where Johnny tells June "you're an angel". At this point, Johnny had been detoxing with the help of June and her parents. I don't remember the exact wording but June explains to Johnny that they're friends and that June wants to see her friend get better and that she knew how good of a man Johnny was. Now, this wasn't the first time she had to watch John go through this process, but she was there for him every time. Sometimes she had to be a little hard on him, but I really believe that every long lasting relationship needs that. Two people who are in love need to be able to give the tough love when necessary and they need to be able to see through each others flaws to know the good behind it all. I say that because I know I'm imperfect. I know I am FULL of flaws. There are times I don't know how I managed to get my fiance to agree to marry me, but I see this movie and I see how much June cares for John, Then I'm able to look at the woman I will soon call my wife and I see that same love. I know that I have these flaws, but I know that after everything her and I have been through, she knows my heart, she knows my character, and she knows that the only thing in the world I want is to love her and our little boy to the best of my ability. 

That brings me to couple number 2: Tim McGraw and Faith Hill

Now I probably won't be able to spend much time on these two, mainly because they have done a really good job of keeping their love life out of public sight...But that's where the beauty in this one is. Something I have realized lately, is that I spend a lot less time on social media. I put most of my energy in to work and in to being able to be around for my fiance and our son. I don't care about who is having lunch at Chipotle or who is going bowling or who is drinking beers with who...now I would be lying if I said I didn't still get on and post a status, but I am far less interested about what's going on on Facebook and twitter these days, but that's because my interest lies with my family. Tim McGraw and Faith Hill have made very much that same choice. Sure Tim still tours like a mad man every summer and he finds time to work out like crazy, but he also ensure that he find time to be with his 3 daughters and his wife. Faith Hill is easily one of the greatest female voices of our time. I am personally not a fan of her music, but I would be a fool to say she isn't an incredible vocalist. I just can't relate to her solo music. I will say though, every time I find out her and Tim are releasing another song together I get about as excited as a kid on Christmas. Tim McGraw has been very public about his sobriety and the struggles he had with alcoholism. Obviously, I have never seen any of Tim's problems manifest themselves first hand, but he states himself that he was becoming a problem, and that takes a real man. Faith could've walked away. Lord knows money wouldn't have been a problem. But once you find real love, you don't want to let that go. I really believe that's what keeps them going. They know what they have and they don't ever want to lose it. They have a storybook love life and they have set an example that I think everyone should follow. 

Now....Number 3: Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert

These two are just fun. Lets look at what we've got here...Johnny and June have the battered past that lead to a beautiful future. Then there is Tim and Faith who life just brought together and they managed to build something beautiful outside the world of country music while still existing in it, and there are these two. Blake and Miranda are the epitome of fun. They have endured so ,many blistering rumors about how bad their marriage is, and they still seem to come out of it with a smile. Now someone can correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure these two were friends long before they became an item. These two truly are two best friends who fell in love and they show that in public all the time. I know at one point Miranda had tweeted Blake and said [insert magazine name here] reported that our marriage is struggling!" Blake's response was nothing more than you would expect..."I can't wait to read and see if we make it!" They clearly know how to handle the pressure and they obviously aren't afraid to have fun with it! I have no doubt that they have their problems. What marriage or relationship doesn't? What I love though is that they always come out on the other side. 

I don't think it would surprise any of you that I write more posts when I am going through something in my personal life that I need to work out. Most of the time, the problems that I'm having are me just over thinking a situation. That's something I have a bad habit of doing. Something I am learning very quickly, and gladly so, is that I have a woman in my life that has agreed to stand by me through every up and every down we ever need to face. She has agreed to support me and to love me and to be my saving grace when the rest of the world will seem against me. I have a woman who will be faithful through the good times and the bad. Ironically enough, our first dance at our wedding is going to be "God Gave Me You" by Blake Shelton. I wake up every single day knowing just how lucky I am to have her in my life because truth be told, she is "loves great martyr, and [I'm] the flattered fool," I wake up every single morning knowing that God has blessed me with a woman unlike any other. I see her and I see perfection. I see through the flaws (with her they are pretty hard to see to begin with) but I see the flaws and know that those flaws and I see my own and I know that we were meant to be together. Even physically, no hand has ever fit so perfectly in mine and no other hand ever will. When I hold her at night, I know that no other person will fit so perfectly next to me the way she does. When I met her ten years ago, I had no idea where we would end up, but as time went on, I definitely knew where I wanted us to go. And luckily for me, there was a country song for every single situation we found ourselves in along the way.

So today, I am thankful for my soul mate, I am thankful for her patience. I am thankful for her understanding. I am thankful for her willingness to love my imperfections. I am thankful for her. A song I heard recently said "Have you ever done drugs? It's like love. Have you ever done love? It's like a drug." Those words really are true. Her love is my drug, as cliche as that may be. I couldn't live a day without her in my life. and I will spend every day for the rest of my life bettering myself to make sure I am every bit the man she needs to be. I firmly believe that there's someone out there for everyone. If you haven't found that someone for you, keep looking. Love always finds a way. 

The Reason Behind The Name

The Reason Behind The Name

So today on my way to work I had what would be described as a trip down memory lane. I was listening to Tim McGraw's "Southern Voice" album and I had it on "shuffle". It was interesting to me that what followed were the songs that made me fall in love with the album to begin with. If you haven't heard the album, I would highly suggest that you check it out. It's a super easy album to listen to from start to finish. Now I know that this is already sounding like another blog entry where all I'm going to do is praise Tim McGraw, but it's not going to be that way. This post is really going to be me explaining to you what made me love that album and what it was I related to that made the album so special to me. So just hang in there with me and we will go on a walk down memory lane for me, and for you, it will be an explanation as to why my blog, my outlet, is called "Southern Voice". 

The first song that came on was "Ghost Town Train". The reason I loved this song is multi leveled. When this album first came out, I was working really hard to win over the girl of my dreams. (I'm not going to tell you how that worked out just yet.) We were best friends all through high school and things were starting to get a little intense for us because she was going through a major life change and I was getting ready to leave half way across the country for two years. In high school we never dated, but everyone told at least me that we should. It got to a point where people would come up and ask me if it was ok for them to ask her out. Now, the reason this is important is because when this album came out, I felt that it was the closest I had ever gotten to winning this girl over. I had been "silently" admiring her all through high school and I don't know that she really ever knew until our junior or senior year. We had been graduated from high school for about a year by the time this album came out and we had started the conversation about how I felt about her. The sad thing is that there was still no chance for me at that time. So when "Ghost Town Train" came on for the very first time, I was thinking about how this girl who I had been "chasing" for so long, I thought was right within my reach, but just like that, she was gone. Nothing super deep or anything, but this song took on a much deeper meaning later on in our story because of details that will be divulged later. 

The second song that came on was "I Love You, Goodbye". When I buy a CD...yes I still buy CD's, I look at the back and I look at the titles of each song and I start to formulate my own ideas about what I think each song is going to be about. This is one of those songs where I couldn't have been more wrong. I don't really even remember what I originally thought the song was going to be about, but I remember being really embarrassed for how off my assumption was. This song is a story, and a great one at that. It is about a boy who's parents are divorced and he leaves home, where he lives with his mom because he needed to get away from the troubled home that was surrounded by the pain of divorced parents. The first verse talks about the boy being caught between a fight between his angry mom and drunk father and the boy having to get his dad home and put to bed finishing the verse with the words "Dad, I love you, goodbye.", The second verse describes how he goes back home to his moms long enough to gather his things and leave a note for her in her bed telling her that he was leaving and saying that if he were to stay "something sacred's gonna die."...And the end of the note is also the end of the verse where all he says is "Mom, I love you, Goodbye."...The third verse describes the boy getting a phone call from his sister letting him know that "his mother was at the doorstep of heaven's pure, white light." Then the verse talks about his dad showing up at the service and they have an exchange at the end of the service and the father is now sober and asking his son for forgiveness, with the verse ending "son, I love you, goodbye." The end of the song, you hear the boy, now a man, landing in Texas and makes a phone call to his dad to see if he can visit but he got no answer. The end of the song, the last words, "Your grandson has your eyes. He couldn't say anything else, cause he started to cry, and he choked out 'Dad, I love you....Goodbye." This song holds a very special place in my heart because I had a parent who spent the first 12 years of my life in jail/prison and another parent who spent most of my life losing a battle with drugs. Now, I have little to no relationship with either of them and I am building my own life.....Still not telling you about the girl yet....

The next song was one that to most might not have "struck a chord", but I loved the message. The song is called "If I Died Today"....It's Tim asking if he died today, who would tie up his loose ends? Would he be missed? Who would show up at the service? Who would miss him? Would he even be missed? It's a great song. I love the chord progression and the way the lyrics just roll with the chords. It's got an awesome acoustic feel. Now with that, I have to say, I think everyone goes through a stage in life where we ask ourselves those same questions. We are all human. We all ponder death and these questions I think are all normal, and for me, they're motivation. I think sadly sometimes people make decisions that cause them to lose important relationships. I will openly admit to anyone who asks that I have burned a few bridges...But that doesn't mean I have to burn anymore. That doesn't mean that I can't repair the ones I've burned, or that I can't at least try to. I love my life. I love the outlook I have on my future, and I love the people I've managed to keep in my life, but I would be lying to you if I told you I never wondered about how life would go on without me. I don't wonder those things because I'm depressed or upset, I wonder those things because I wonder sometimes if I am living a life that others would miss sharing with me. I wonder if I have done anything worth missing. That song has caught me at the best times to remind me that with every step I take, I want to be making decisions and taking steps that only better my future, not only mine, but my family's future. 

That album came out back in 2010. Since then, I have served a mission for my church, I have fallen away from that church, made choices that have eventually now, found me in love with that beautiful girl I chased around through high school and we have a little boy who she's allowed me to share with her and I loo at what we have and I see a beautiful family. I see a beautiful future and a beautiful life. Here we are in 2015 and that's ten years from when I met that girl. We have been through so much together and I know that there is so much more to come. We will be married before the end of the year and I can say that "if I died today" I would be missed. I know I would be. I'm so lucky to have such a beautiful life. I hope everyone is able to find someone they love as much as I love my fiance. She truly is my better half and my soul mate. If you have read this far, you now know what will fuel every post I make from here on out. This is my creative outlet. I will be sharing mostly music related things, but I hope whatever finds it's way here, you will read, and you will enjoy, Share your opinions with me. Ask me questions about music if you're looking for an opinion. Music is a universal langue. I leaned that in high school. It was in a choir class that I met the woman I will be marrying soon and it is music that helps me express myself. So read this blog knowing that I am simply expressing opinions, person experience, and sometimes just random information. Now, I'm gonna go listen to some Hank Jr....Till next time my friends.